Just who do you think you are missy!?!?!?

About me:

I have been heavy for as long as I can remember. No, thats not true. I started getting heavy once I hit about second or third grade. I was in Catholic school at the time so you can imagine just how unflattering those uniforms were (not to mention uncomfortable!). I steadily began gaining weight despite an active childhood. I didn't just sit around eating and watching TV. I lived in a neighborhood full of boys so I was outside everyday playing army, baseball, GI Joes, hide and seek and many other games. I was the kid that came home with dirt from head to toe, a skinned knee and a rip in her jeans. Yeah, I was that kid! Anyway, like I said, despite all that activity I steadily gained weight. I was also the kid that swam competetively from the time she was in fifth grade until her senior year of high school. I also threw shot put in junior high and first year of high school until a shoulder injury put that on the shelf.



I never wanted for anything growing up---well except a horse but I can let that slide. My parents both worked their butts off to provide for my sister and me. I was a latch key kid that only ate breakfast during the winter when dad was home to make it for me (dad's job is seasonal), depended on school lunch in the afternoon, and was served a home cooked meal each night. I wasn't big on veggies but I did eat them, except salad--blah! I usually went back for seconds and had a big glass of milk to go with it. We were a meat and potatos with veggies on the side family through and through, BUT before you start shaking your head like you've got it all figured out keep reading!



Along with living in a neighborhood where I could go outside and play from sunup to sun down, I had an active family as well. We were always out fishing, swimming at the beach, tubing behind the boat, or whatever! We had this great rule in place for the weekends. Cleaning always seemed to take up a large chunk of our playtime on the weekend so we decided that we would clean up until noon on Saturdays. At noon, however, we would stop whatever we were doing and just go play! It was great. We were always on the lookout for new things to do, but mostly settled for the short list of favorites. The one thing they had in common though was that they always included food. Chips, soda, or other conveince foods. I can remember stopping in with my dad at B&M Bait and Tackle in Mayport FL to get bait before heading to the jetties for our fishing trips. Whenever we'd stop in there it was a ritual that I got a packet of $.25 Wriggley's gum and a blue Ne-Hi soda.



All of my favorite memories growing up include fabulous adventures and events, however, they also included whatever I was eating at the time as well. My third birthday was the great upside down cake that ended in my lap! Scalloping with my family on the gulf coast included eating fresh scallops and steaks for dinner. Heading to the Keys? Dont forget the yummy lobster and conch fritters! Don't get me wrong, I understand that no matter what you do, you need to eat. I just think that its a bit strange that not only do I associate the activity I was doing, I always associate the foods that were eaten as well.



Okay, Im getting a bit side tracked here. Lets boil this down to the nitty gritty--I was a middle class kid growing up who was active and adventerous. Even staying active wasnt enough to stop me from gaining weight which eventually made me overweight, then obese, then eventually morbidly obese....which brings me to yesterday.



Going under the knife!

After attending a weight loss seminar by Dr. Thomas Clark and the Weight Loss Surgery Center of Hampton Roads, I had made the decision that I was going to have this surgery. It took several months of doctors visits and labwork. I had to see a psychologist and nutritionist as well. Thankfully I had been doing Weight Watchers for several months and was able to take in my food and activity journals to show the nutritionist. That sped things up considerably. I also had to procure 5 years worth of past medical data to show the insurance company in order to be approved for this surgery.

Finally the day came and Cat called to tell me that I was approved and we could go ahead and schedule a surgery date. That date was for April 8, 2009. With the surgery scheduled, I knew that I didnt want to treat this as a "last hoorah" or anything simliar. Anytime Ive done a diet or whatever I always had my last day of debauchery so to speak. I didnt want this to start the same way as all of my failed diets so I made sure to keep following a somewhat healthy eating pattern and tried to stay somewhat active.

As time went by, my nerves began to get more and more unsettled. Thankfully my best friend came to see me and kept me company. We got to do some great things before my surgery date like visit Colonial Williamsburg, play tourist in Washington D.C., and spend some well needed time with my family. The day did arrive though for me to have my surgery.

Yesterday I underwent gastric banding surgery to help me get my weight under control. Why would I ever want to admit that to anyone? Shouldn't I be ashamed that I couldn't do it on my own or that people might find out that I wasnt disciplined enough to lose the fat without the help of surgery? Pshhhhhhh No way! Growing up fat definitely taught me that caring what others thought of me would destroy me if I let it. Its not easy growing up among your peers being heavy. So instead of worrying about what others would think of me having this surgery, I thought long and hard about how I would feel about having it done.


Im not going to lie. At first it felt like defeat. Like many, I have tried anything and everything under the sun. Diets, fads, starvation, pills, etc. which either didn't work at all, or caused the weight to come back soon after, and often more than what I started with! When it got to the point that I was winded walking up a flight of stairs, I knew it was time to get real and figure out something fast. My answer was to look into weight loss surgery. I had toyed with it before but never done much about it. It is a HUGE step and one that shouldn't be taken lightly.



Like many, I did a TON of research. I joined discussion groups to pick the brains of people that had had the surgery done. I knew a couple of people who had this type of surgery as well as the Ruen Y Gastric Bypass. After doing my research I settled on having the Banding procedure done. Everyone has their own reasons for choosing the different surgery option and mine were pretty simple.

1) I wanted something I could recover from rather quickly
2) I wanted something that could be reversed if needed
3) I wanted something that if I decided to have another child could be altered to accomodate a pregnancy
4) I wanted something less invasive then full GB surgery.


So now you know a little bit about me and where I am coming from with my decision for the whole weight loss surgery thing.

Just some parting words though.....

This is NOT cheating
This is NOT an easy way out
This is NOT an instanct success
This is NOT the be all end all to weight loss

I will have to WORK to make this happen
I will undergo invasive surgery to make this happen
I will have to work out and exercise just like everyone else
I will have to watch what I eat more carefully than before to make sure I get enough nutrients
THIS IS ONLY A TOOL!!!!